Freddie started school

Frederick, my first born child, my baby, my son, my reason, growing up so fast, started preschool this week. It was such a big moment for our family. He's 4.5+. He turns 5 this month in two weeks. I'm so glad I had him home with me for as long as I did and that we have shared and experienced so much together. He's has been healthily attached to me and I to him. And this is just another step in letting go. I love him so much. We all rallied around him, preparing, and Collin ans I buying supplies, worrying and planning, all so he won't have to. All so he can feel secure and confident and just go and be a child at school. 

Though I have had tears through the preparation, when the time came to walk him to his new classroom, the Meadowlarks, and leave him with his loving teacher, Ms Atara, (with extra shoes, extra outfits, a vegetable he chose (broccoli) for the class soup, some acorns Freddie and I gathered to share with the class, and rain gear just in case), I had no tears. I knew he was ready. (Though I get emotional about it now!😊)

He had been excited all morning and ran into the front door of the school, me trailing behind. He had slept 12 hours the night before and had an awesome breakfast and lunch. He was happy and ready. He sat right down at a table and started rolling out some playdough. I knelt down and said goodbye and he kissed me right on the lips and said, "bye mom." With a thankful swollen heart, I was able to walk away and back to the car where my mom was waiting with Harriet and Ella. Hattie did not have an easy time. She was quite emotional Tuesday and again today. She didn't want Fred to go or wanted to go with him. She wants to go to preschool. I am going to try my hardest to make this a special time for Ella and her and I. We are going shoe shopping today! 

And she has been telling us all about her preschool at her home and that we can all visit it tonight. 

Today when we were walking from the park to his school, Hattie was getting very sad and Fred put his arm around her and said, "I'm so sorry Hattie. I have to go. I'll miss you." 

When I picked Freddie up after his first day, I have never seen him so happy, balanced, well. I'm so happy too. 

So far in this new home it has been a simple life. Things are still chaos inside with boxes everywhere and not knowing where the broom is or finding time to do dishes. When Collin gets back we will work together and find a rhythm. But life feels quiet out here in the trees and mountains. It feels calm and like there is plenty of time to do and be and rest. 

Heavenly Father knows me and loves me.