recent spiritual revelations and impressions. things I'm learning and trying.

I am supposed to be in this ward; supposed to learn from these women. They are going through things that I will be going through in the next 13+ years. They are sending their chidlren into tthe world at school, on missions. Their children are preparing for educations adn adventures and marriage. I am blessed to have all of these mentors and examples.


We need to have more fun in our home with our kids. I know everyone will say, "Nikki and Collin are so fun!!! And we do have a lot of fun...but life has gotten stressful with another baby (also wonderful, of course). But stress is added to everyone, and less time and more things to do, fewer hands to do them with. We become short. When kids don't cooperate, we make threats, which they never respond well to. We are learning and coming out of certain things and starting new things. The period of adjustment is big for us all. The holidays were quite emotional and stressful on us this year and we are also learning and adjusting from that. Learning to let go and forgive and grow. Not judge. Understand and accept. Teach forgiveness. So all of this is going on and our kids start getting stressed out and acting out and I realize that they seem quite unhappy at the moment. They are having a hard time even wanting to go to school, or with even the smallest amount of cooperation. I prayed. "How can I help them figure this out? How can it get better? Please inspire me."
And then I start cleaning and thinking. And it all comes to me.
We need to have more fun. We get out on adventures, do "fun" things, keep busy. But day to day, at home, I rush myself and them too much. I demand the word, "hurry!!" too much. Collin and I put too much pressure on ourselves, take ourselves so seriously, get offended more easily. This transfers to when our kids want to play, us either saying no, there's not time, or just playing a little and getting tired out. Not laughing about things enough. Not taking the time to let them do it their ways. And when we do an activity, taking too much control. We barely have the brain space to think. And being a parent takes a lot. So we are learning and adjusting and this is part of it.
So we discussed this and Collin agreed and we agreed to try so hard to just have fun.
Say yes.
Have more energy and a happier attitude.
Let our stamina outlast theirs in any game or activity instead of ending it, leaving them to beg for us to keep going.
But how??
According to the Happiness Project, you make it till you make it.
If you need more energy, pretend you have more energy until you have it!
If you need to be happier and let things slide off your back and bounce back and have an upbeat, optimistic attitude, just pretend you can do all those things, and I honestly believe that they will happen.


Goals. I've been listening to The Alison Show podcast. SO inspiring.

Two pieces of advice have stuck out to me.

PRIORITIZE. She insists that if you don't prioritize your life, then someone else will prioritize it for you. MIND BLOWN. So in everything I do, when I start getting overwhelmed or start multitasking to the point that I'm just running around and not realy finishing anything....
prioritize. "What are the most important 3 things right now?"

(this morning)
1. Finish this post. I need to clear my head, write this down, type with my fingers, and feel like I understand myself.
2. Make the kids breakfast.
3. Set up Monopoly JR so we can all play during breakfast and throughout the day.

(in my life this weekend)
1. write down a few things I want to do in Stockholm in a book.
2. help Collin with bringing in the shelf.
3. finish VT report.


MORE TO COME.

52 questions week 3

What goals are you actively working toward right now?

I have been walking in the mornings with a few friends on my street. It wasn't working out to do stroller strides right now, so we've been loading the kids up in the double stroller and heading out in the freezing, foggy, snowblizzardy winter. I hate winter, guys. At least when it snows it's pretty. Jan and Feb are just ugly when it's cold. 

The air is starting to get bad, so I'm not sure how long these walks will last. But I am also making a couple of friends while walking. 

But still, I miss being with people who KNOW me and LOVE me for me. I feel a great unrest within my soul right now. I feel lonely. I feel so much all at once. I want to 

a. attend yoga weekly. I am so inspired by my yoga instructor of 1 year now. She is the most incredible person, Alicia of Salt Lake Prenatal Yoga. (and post natal yoga, and mommy and me yoga). She made a HUGE difference in my pregnancy with Ella. So much healing happened. So much confidence and faith developed. Tonight was no exception.

b. forgive

c. have confidence. I know I'm doing what is right for me and I cannot feel sorry or regretful for that. 

d. be happy RIGHT NOW. choose happiness!

New Years Goals for the Smiths

Nikki:
This year I hope to reach these goals:
1. Make a real friend.
2. Exercise; take care of my body
3. Make our house a home.
4. Prayer on my knees morning and night

Freddie:
1. say my prayers every morning and night
2. Start kindergarten next fall

Ella:
Learn how to walk and grow some teeth

Hattie:
Start primary and be in my own class.

Collin:
More quality family time
A garden

STARTIN small

okay for a while there I was doing so great with working out, losing weight...but it didn't quite make it past the middle of january there, so here I am, starting over, and excited about it.

sometimes I don't do Yoga because the time committment seems daunting. With the above video, I have no excuse. And Freddie totally did it with me today. Love that kid. I also joined a gym!!! BLAST! Fitness!!! It's brand new and about a block away and they have Zumba classes and free child care, WOO!! I've been sick the past week so I'll start up hopefully Monday.

Goals!!!!!!! Dreams!!!!!!!! 2013!!!!!!!

New Years!!!! I want this year to be awesome!!!! I WANT TO HAVE A BETTER ATTITUDE.
I want to have another baby or get pregnant.
I want to move...into a house with a yard so Fred and I can play out there all the time.
I want to HELP COLLIN REACH HIS GOALS AND DREAMS.
I want to read my scriptures daily and finish the Doctrine and Covenants. I want to read scriptures with Frederick. I WANT TO HAVE FAMILY HOME EVENING EVERY WEEK.
I want to be happy. I want to improve my marriage. It is wonderful now but we had lots of challenges in general this year and I want Collin to KNOW HE IS MY #1.
I want to stop yelling.
I WANT TO DO ZUMBA EVERY OTHER DAY AND YOGA THE DAYS IN BETWEEN.
I want to continue my video chat book club.
I want to write letters regularly again.
AND STARTING NOW Collin and I have a life goal of watching ALL the James Bond films! (I know, I know..."there are some that are really boring"...) we still want to do it!
This year feels good. I feel it in my heart and bones. I want to do good things with all the good things that have been given to me. Happy New Year!!

Happy 2013!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(by the way....crazy that its 2013, huh?!)

remember...
2012 resolutions
Smith 2011 top 12
2011 party in DC

great excellent wonderful lovely happy

Hypnobirthing went so great last night! I love our instructor and the other couple in our class. It's all so relaxing and exciting and positive. Can't wait till the next class.

Today I have another prenatal appt, and then I'm getting my (20 week) ultrasound (at 30 weeks)! I'm excited to finally see Skittlecore (the last time was at 7.5 weeks!!!!!) Then tomorrow Dot gets her first round of shots. What a medical week for our family.

Goals this week:

-CS and I both write letters to Skittlecore and videotape people talking to him/her in the belly
-practice replacing negative thoughts with positive ones