yesterday was rough

had a headache for the past two days and I woke up with it pounding. (probably from lack of sleep? pain killers haven't worked.) So Collin headed to work and I fed Freddie then we both fell back asleep, hard. we woke up around 11:30am, he was crying and starving. We were both super sweaty. I'm SO out of it at this point. I feed him a little and then he pees out all over me and the bed. I say, okay, shower time. In the past he's been totally happy and fine in the shower, but this time he just screamed and screamed and screamed. I got him out, me still nasty, wrapped him up, and then he pooped ALL over his towel. I get him diapered and try feeding him, but he's so upset and frustrated that we just can't get it. And at this point it's 12 something and I have not eaten A THING all day, and there is no liquid in sight to quench my insane thirst. I'm on our bed, can't get up, and I just start crying and crying with Fred. And I'm praying, talking to God, and telling him how hard this is, when..............................

my mom just comes in the door. I was saved! I told her I was so glad she was there. And she had brought me the most delicious chicken salad sandwich I've ever had. So I eat, and drink coconut water so I'm able to think straight and Fred and I are both calm so I can feed him effectively. Phew. Then he's dozing off and my mom holds him and I'm able to take a LONG HOT WONDERFUL SHOWER and even SHAVE my legs for the first time since he was born!!!! I wash off the pee and poop and milk and sweat and frustration, and feel just gratitude because the Lord is mindful of me and just when I thought I couldn't take it anymore, he sent me help.

While my sweet, darling, angel, Freddie, slept, my mom and I were able to get so much done around the apt, and when she left I slept even more and just felt so good. It's amazing how quickly things can change. Then my mom left and Collin got home and we had Family Home Evening, and we decided we were going to try our hand and go out to a movie. I was really nervous about it all working out, but I fed Fred a TON, and we went right over to the theater and watched Dream House. The seats were SO comfortable, the tickets at Harkins are cheap (only $7!!) and Freddie, swaddled up in his father's arms, SLEPT the entire time. I figured I'd nurse him if he woke up and got fussy, but I didn't even have to! The movie was really loud, too, so he's learning to sleep with lots of noise. The movie was pretty good. A great cast: Daniel Craig, Rachel Weise (who did a phenomenal job) and Naomi Watts (who was a little bit wasted on this film...her character was alright, but she's always enjoyable to watch). And as a psychological thriller, it was the perfect start to my favorite Holiday month, Halloween. woo hoo.

We can DO this! We can be parents and lovers and happy and fun and adventurers still! And man, I just can't get over how cute this guy is and how much I love to just look at him. Both of them.

Got milk????