Spring has sprung!!!

Spring is in full force in Phoenix and you know what that means...it's 99 degrees!!!! Ahhhh!!! The pool water is getting warmer, the heat is getting closer, and I'm getting sweatier by the day.

We are loving the warm/cool breezy evenings and still cool mornings. But apparently the heat is record breaking for this time of year. Oh man, we have already started planning our mini summer trips that will get us as far from the heat as possible almost every weekend! 

Getting outside and even riding public transit as much as possible before it gets too hot to even step outside. Seriously. You can disintegrate. Below, Hattie's first bus ride. She alept most if the time. She loved it. Fred loves the bus sooooo much. I forgot to let him press the button to open the back doors and he was soooooooooooo sad. But don't worry--he got to press it on the way back.

Bugs and babies

Worst thing in my life. It's the time of year for bugs. I can't kill em or squish them or anything and Collin wasn't home so I drowned it with scalding hot water till its body ripped in half. Poor jerk. These two were fascinated. Monte just played then left. Great job, hunter. 

Children's museum with three of my favorite people. Look how big Freddie is!

Bus ride to our appointment at blossom yesterday. It was a strange hot one. We hasn't taken the train or bus in a while and Fred loved it. It's always fun on the way there but horrible, miserable, hot forever on the way back. 

"Rock a bye baby on the tree tops." So sweet, big brother Fred, till the bough breaks and he throws the baby overhand back into the cradle. 

The appointment was good. I took my sugar test, I'm measuring right on (so there all you idiots who keep telling me, WOW, you're huge!!!), I have to practice having Fred climb up to me instead of me picking him up from now on, and we discussed Fred coming to the birth. Collin and I want him there but we will be flexible, like if its in the middle of the night and he's asleep, or if anything else happens and it's not comfortable to have him in there. But I'm a very calm and quiet labor & birther and he's a pretty even tempered guy. Plus I know everything will be even more smooth this time. It would ve a great experience to have him a part of this miracle. We will go with the flow and I think it will all work out great. We have been watching animal and human births and talking lots to prepare for this great event and all the big changes to follow. 

Hey didi dot. 

James Oliver Skeen

One of my dearest friends on this planet, Morgan, had a baby boy just over a month ago. She did such a great job and is doing a great job despite the many challenges and changes of being a new mom. I watch her with her little Oliver and she looks like such a natural: holding him, feeding him, comforting him. She keeps saying "no one told me _____!" It's true. We forget or don't want to worry you or just know that everyone's experience is unique. But still, I wish there was more that was talked about openly instead of a little taboo...like the fact that everyone says I'm crazy or brave or "they could never do that," for not having drugs during labor but to me recovery was waayyyyy harder than labor ever was, and everyone has to go through that in some way or another.

Well congratulations to dear Morgan and her amazing husband Tom, who is taking such good care of both her and baby Oliver!!!

The first time I held him I felt handicapped...it's crazy how I forgot how to hold a newborn! And Freddie was huge compared to him!!! Fred would acknowledge Oliver, but kept leaving and walking around the house. Oliver is such a good baby and so cute. I love him! Not much better than having best friends experience the joys of motherhood. (and sorry...tortures too...) ;)

Double the trouble!!!!

Kitty puppy (written 4/10/13)

We found out we are having another baby! he or she will be referred to as kittypuppy. In this second pregnancy, it's different because though I know I'm pregnant and think of that fact often, my number one thought is Frederick. I keep thinking if how all this will effect him. But Collin and I are so happy. We are thrilled.
Saturday I was a few days overdue longer than my longest cycle, so in between general conference sessions, I went into the bathroom alone and prayed and peed on a test. I told Heavenly Father that i know this is in his hands and i will respect whatever the outcome. Two lines. I cried and thanked him. Then waited three minutes just to be sure. Then I went out and showed Collin, who stared at it, laughed, hugged me and cried. Then we scooped up frederick, our darling 1 year old, and hugged and kissed him and told him he is having a brother or sister.
We have so far told just a few friends. We are excited to be able to tell Collins parents and Ian and Ashley in person!
I have been extremely tired, am starting to feel nauseated, and have been experiencing small cramps. I have an appointment tomorrow with Blossom, which I'm excited about. They have a new midwife, Diane. Which will be interesting. I wish I could just see Nichelle only and have her for sure, but what can I do about that? Nothing.
I've been determined to keep exercising at la fitness, sometimes forcing myself out the door in the morning. Today I was so tired. And the music sounded weird. And things taste weird and smell so strongly. I want to get out but I don't have the energy to chase Freddie.
Morgan had her baby last night at 11:05pm. He looks like a perfect angel. She did amazingly.

Collin wants to take Hypnobirthing again.
I also want to take the belly dancing during labor class at blossom. And I want to focus on a water birth. I want to eat healthy. Ill eat my 100 grams of protein every day and drink tons of water so I don't swell and avoid Bell's Palsey.

Alright; nap time.

James Oliver just minutes old. 

I E I will always love you!!!

Love is a many splendored thing! Love lifts us up where we belong! All you need is love!!!

Happy happy Valentines day!! Growing up my mom always made a big deal on valentines: cards for everyone, decorating the table and house with hearts-galore, heart-shaped pancakes, meatloaf, potatoes, etc. In high school I didn't date much so Valentines day was a day for LOVED ones: dear friends and family. We would shower each other with pink tulips, chocolate, treats, cards, and glitter. (Or maybe not glitter but you get it. This is the girliest I ever was.) now that I'm married to the man of my dreams, I get to be super gushy romantic too. And I got Fred started early as he glued a million paper hearts on a card and let me trace his hand for Collin, and enjoyed a few suckers and sugars cookies himself. I love love! Happy Valentines Day, all!! 

 

 

 

and some oldies circa 2009...

Love, right now, is me changing a super stinky poop diaper even though I really don wanna.

sommmmebody turned ONE!

Charlie girl turned ONE YEAR OLD! I love that these two are EXACTLY 4 months apart, that they love to play and that I love Charlie's mom, Emily, SOOOOO much. She has been a wonderful friend to me, ever inspiring and encouraging. Well, you and Micah have done an amazing job on your sweet darling little doll, so far. Keep it up, dudes. We love you all so much. Bruno, too. 

Brunch for Bride

Happy wedding shower Erin! This was 2 weeks ago. Collin watched Freddie and I got to go have brunch, make my own mimosas (mine had sparkling cider), play games with cute panties, just be girly and gush with one of my dearest friends since 7th grade about her up owning wedding. I loved it. The downside besides missing Fred: not having his diaper bag and totally losing when we played that get points for having tons of awesome crap in your bag game. Oh well! I was light! Congratulations to the gorgeous bride!!

Marriage.

Marriage is hard. No one is perfect and I do not have the solutions or answers for anyone. There is an ideal. And I believe that we should promote and strive to that ideal despite the fact that every single one of us comes short of it.
I have close friends and family for whom marriages have ended. But that is not the end of their story or their striving. I love them and look up to them for what they are accomplishing and teaching me.
As I watch marriage in the popular culture there seems to be strong messages that I find really negative. I was watching Grey's Anatomy and they are like, "Marriage is a cage." The only way the characters can be happy is to get a divorce. They sign the papers and suddenly they are free from hurting each other. Lack of commitment has taken off all the pressure, and they can be in love.
Then in Nashville, a couple is not happy in their marriage; they don't want to hurt their children though, who have no idea what's going on, so they come up with this elaborate plan of how to keep up appearances but not have to see each other or work at anything.
I believe in marriage. I believe it is challenging and scary at times but that its that most amazing and wonderfully rewarding thing ever. It's terrifying to put oneself out there. My spouse has seen me at my worst and best. He's seen me be fired from a job, something so utterly humiliating. He's seen me graduate from collage. He has witnessed me pushing a baby out of my body, something he still says was the most incredible but also the craziest thing he's ever seen! Ha!
He has put up with my crazy moods and wacko thoughts. He has to listen to me go on and on...telling intricate details or venting or getting passionate about nursing or child birth or animals or whatever!
It's scary for me to let someone in that much. He could get fed up and leave me at any moment. But I feel that that is marriage: commitment, true trust, and putting yourself out there, even if it doesn't work out. I'm not naive. And I'm very sensitive to the fact that people try so hard and things aren't as they planned. No one but Collin and I and God know what we have been through in our marriage. We have been low, and somehow through the atonement of Christ and the grace of God, climbed out of our pit, together. I hope I am not hurting anyone by saying these things because I am not judgmental of anyone.
I truly believe in marriage. I truly have faith in it. I don't think it's a cage, I think it opens up a million possibilities.

The first haircut

Just look at those golden locks!


Collin and I have been debating on cutting Frederick's hair for months now. We both have gone back and forth on wanting to chop it, and wanting to keep those beautiful curls growing forever. Well, finally, it was the right time!
My best friend, Jayna -of Jayna H Photography- did such a great job. We put on his favorite show, Yo, Gabba Gabba, of course, and she let him feel the clippers and helped him feel so safe and excited. He did so well that she had no problem cutting his hair with scissors all over too!!!


My super cute super happy little boy!!



Collin and I absolutely love how it turned out! Freddie likes it too. Thank you to Jayna for such a great job! She took a gorgeous picture of him, too!


(And by the way, she took our family photos a few weeks back and I'll be posting some of those soon! )